1.Cool WhatsApp Status Quotes
1. “You don’t like me? That’s fine. My sole purpose in love isn’t to impress you.”
2. “I’m neither Superman nor Batman. I’m a superhero for all women.”
3. “I’m so jealous of my parents. I never had a kid as cool as they did.”
4. “Hey, I speak my mind, and I never, ever mind what I speak.”
5. “Man, God is really creative. I mean, just look at me!”
6. “You know you’re the ugly one when your friends ask you to take the group picture.”
7. “If I broke down and agreed with you, we’d both be wrong.
8. “I could be wrong. But I seriously doubt it.”
9. “It’s okay if you don’t like me. I’m not a Facebook status.”
10. “Congrats, graduate! Now a thermometer isn’t the only thing that has degrees with no brains.”
11. “Life is too short. Don’t waste your time copying my WhatsApp status.”
12. “I never really forgive people. I pretend like I do, and then wait for that perfect moment to destroy them.”
13. “You treated me like I was an option, so I left you like you were a choice.”
14. “It’s so miserable without you. It’s almost like having you here.”
15. “The attitude I have will always be based on the way you treat me.”
16. “Please don’t talk out loud. You’ll only lower the IQ of the entire street if you do.”
17. “I’ll be nicer to you when you start being a little smarter.”
18.” If you left me without a reason, do not come back with an excuse.”
19. “I choose to make the rest of my life the best of my life!”
20. Be happy in front of people who don’t like you, “It kills them”
21. HOME: where I can look ugly and enjoy it
22. I speak my mind. I never mind what I speak.
23. Today morning when I was driving my Ferrari, the alarm woke me up.
24. I don’t care what people think or say about me, I was not born on this earth to please everybody.
25. I stopped fighting with my inner demons. We are on the same side now.
26. Dear Math, please grow up and solve your own problems, I’m tired of solving them for you.
27. I need Google in my brain.
28. I like to hang out with people that make me forget to look at my phone.
29. I’ve found the recipe for happiness. Can someone just send me some money so that I can buy the ingredients?
30. I started out with nothing and i still have most of it.
2.Love & Romantic Status Quotes for WhatsApp
These type of quotes expresses your thoughts on love and helps you to express it. These are tastefully chosen for you. Here are a few Romantic Status Quotes for WhatsApp;
1. I will walk with you forever.
2. Nothing is perfect, but when I’m with you everything is perfect.
3. Thinking of you is easy, I do it every day. Missing you is the heartache that never goes away.
4. I love my life because it gave me you; I love you because you are my life.
5. There are only two times that I want to be with you… Now and Forever.
6. If I could choose between loving you and breathing I would chose my last breathe to say I love you.
7. Life can give us lots’ of beautiful persons, but only one person is enough for a beautiful life…
8. The essence of romantic love is that wonderful beginning, after which sadness and impossibility may become the rule.
9. Everyone says you only fall in love once, but that’s not true. Every time I hear you voice I fall in Love all over again.
10. Nothing in this world compares to the comfort and security of having someone just to hold your hands.
11. Love is a language spoken by everyone but understood only by heart
12. I love you for all that you are, all that you have been and all you’re yet to be.
13. I dropped a tear in the ocean, the day that I find it is the day I’ll stop loving you.
14. You are the reason why I smile, I love, I breath, I live.
15. My love for you is like a mirror. You can break it into pieces but when you look closely, you’re still in it.
16. In the world there are billions of people, In my eyes I see only you.
17. Age does not protect us from love, But love to some extent protects us from age.
18. I wish dreams were like wishes, and wishes came true, cause in my dreams I’m always with you.
19. Your cute smile is all I need to battle all struggles in my life.
20. I cannot promise to solve all your problems but I can only make sure that I will never let u face them alone.
21. You are like a bright sun as your blazing love can even make the stars fade away.
22. I love you. 1 second to say. 2 minutes to explain and a lifetime to prove it.
23. Love the One Who Makes Ur World Beautiful.
24. I was playing back a thousand memories baby, thinking about everything we’ve been through.
25. I miss you since you walked away, I miss you more and more each day…
26. I want to be old with u….will u allow the same…
27. Once in a while, right 9in the middle of an ordinary life, love gives us a fairy tale.
28. A true relationship is someone who accepts you past…supports your present…love you and encourages your future.
29. Love is not about how much you say I love you but how much you prove that it’s true.
30.It’s always nice to have someone in your life that makes you smile even when they’re not around.
3.Funny & Hilarious WhatsApp Status Quotes
1. I Wonder What Happens When Doctor’s Wife Eats An Apple A Day…
2. Life is Short – Chat Fast!
3. Doing nothing is very hard thing to do…you never know when to finish.
4. People that Change Love status after 30 Sec… GF is the Reason…
5. A book-store is only pieces of evidence we have that people are still thinking.
6. My biggest concern in life is actually how my online friends can be informed of my death..!!
7. Mosquitos are like family. Annoying but they carry your blood.
8. If College has taught us anything, it’s texting without looking 🙂
9. The only time success comes before work is in dictionary.
10. Light travels faster than sound…that’s why people appear bright until they speak
11. True friends don’t judge each other. They judge other people together!
12. All my life I thought air was free…until I bought a bag of chips.
13. I love my job only when I’m on vacation.
14. 80% of boys have girlfriends. Rest 20% are having brain.
15. Sorry about those texts I sent you last night, my phone was drunk.
16. I want someone to give me a Loan and then leave me Alone.
17. The most powerful words other than I LOVE YOU is “Salary is Credited”.
18. We all have that friend who says “I’ll be there around 7” and then shows up around 9.
19. My bed is always extra comfortable when I need to get out of it in the morning.
20. I hate people who steal my ideas, before I think of them.
21. I love my six pack so much, I protect it with a layer of fat.
22. You can never buy Love….But still you have to pay for it…
23. Whoever says “Good Morning” on Monday’s deserves to get slapped..
24. C.L.A.S.S- come late and start sleeping
25. Running away does not help you with your problems, unless you are fat.
26. If time does not wait for you, don’t worry. Just remove the battery from the clock and enjoy life.
27. Try to say the letter M without your lips touching.
28. If common sense is so common why is there so many people without it??
29. I’m just having an allergic reaction to the universe.
30. I used to like my neighbours, until they put a password on their Wi-Fi…
4.Life Attitude WhatsApp Status Quotes
1.My attitude will always be based on how you treat me.
2. My life my rules, so keep your nose out of my business.
3. Attitude is a management, what you think is what you attract.
4. A bad attitude is like a flat tire, you can’t go anywhere until you change it.
5. Excellence is not a skill, it is an attitude.
6. The quickest way to double your money is to FOLD it in half and put it back in your pocket.
7. Don’t judge me by my past. I don’t live there anymore.
8. An ugly personality destroy a pretty face.
9. I don’t need to explain myself because, I know I’m right.
10. If people are trying to bring you ‘Down’.. It only means that you are ‘Above them’.
11. People are like ‘Music’ some say the ‘Truth’ and rest, just noise..
12. When you care for someone, their happiness matters more than yours…!!
13. Beauty is like Moon, looks much better at Night…
14. The greatest pleasure in life is doing the things, people say you can’t
15. The only disability in life is a bad attitude.
16. Life will give you exactly what you need, not what you want
17. The biggest slap to your enemies is your success.
18. It’s my life, so keep your nose out of it….
19. If you are BAD then call me your DAD.
20. I’m only responsible for what I say, not for what you understand.
21. Style is a reflection of your attitude and personality.
22. Always remember you are unique, just like everyone else.
23. I never dreamed about success. I worked for it.
24. Success is not easy and is certainly not for lazy.
25. Every problem comes with some solution…If it doesn’t have any solution, it’s not a problem..!
26. ‘Dream’ as if you’ll live forever.. Live as if tomorrow is last one…
27. I wish I had ‘Google’ in my mind and ‘Anti-virus’ in my heart…
28. Sometimes you need to maintain a distance to keep people close to you.
29. I destroy my enemies when I make them my friends.
30. I wish I could record my dreams and watch them later…
If you want unlimited and hilarious jokes as your next status update ,here are some best WhatsApp Jokes for you;
1. My girlfriend’s birthday is in two days.
And she told me “Nothing would make me happier than a diamond ring”. So I bought her nothing!
2. An airplane was about to crash.
There were 4 passengers on board, but only 3 parachutes. The 1st passenger said “I am Stephen Curry, the best NBA basketball player. The Warriors and my millions of fans need me, and I can’t afford to die.” So he took the 1st pack and left the plane.
The 2nd passenger, Donald Trump, said, “I am the newly-elected US President, and I am the smartest President in American history, so my people don’t want me to die.” He took the 2nd pack and jumped out of the plane.
The 3rd passenger, the Pope, said to the 4th passenger, a 10-year-old schoolboy, “My son, I am old and don’t have many years left, you have more years ahead so I will sacrifice my life and let you have the last parachute.”
The little boy said, “That’s okay, Your Holiness, there’s a parachute left for you. America’s smartest President took my schoolbag.”
3. Difference between a beautiful night and a horror night.
Beautiful night is,
When you hug your teddy bear and sleep.
Horror night is,
When your teddy bear hugs you BACK.
4. What is love? Love is our 7th sense that destroys all 6 sense And makes the person nonsense.
5. Once all the engineering professors were sitting in one plane. Before the takeoff, one announcement came “This plane is made by your students” Then all professors stood up, ran and went outside. But the principal was sitting. One guy came and asked, “are you not afraid”? Then the principal replied “I trust my students very well and I am sure the plane won’t even start”.
6. Those who are single, Let’s sing this song together: Single bells Single bells Single all the way Oh what fun it is to watch those couples fight all day. Yay…
7. Today I saw two blind people fighting, then I shouted “I’m supporting the one with the knife”, they both ran away.
8. 8 p.m. I get an SMS from my girlfriend: Me or football?! 11 p.m. I SMS my girlfriend: You of course.
9. I was in 10th; she was in 10th. I was in 12th; she was in 12th. I got BSc; she got BSc I was doing MSc; she got married. I was preparing for JRF; she’s the mother of 1 child. I got Ph.D.; she’s the mother of 2 children. I am doing Ph.D.; her daughter is in 1st standard I became doctorate; her daughter is in 10th I have joined job; her daughter has joined college And the greatest Irony! Today is my engagement And her daughter is my fiancée.
10. A guy in a plane stood up & shouted: “HIJACK!” All passengers got scared From the other end of the plane, a guy shouted back “HI JOHN”.
11. Hi guys. I am so happy and proud of myself and I thought I should share with you!!! Today I saw myself on TV when I turned it off.
12. My Girlfriend broke up with me. She thinks that I am childish. So I calmed down, took a deep breath, went to her house, rang the doorbell and ran away.
13. My Chinese friend got really sick one day and had to go to a hospital. I went to see him the next day. He just kept whispering “yang qi guan” over and over and then died. I was very sad and Googled his last message after the burial. Apparently, it means “You’re standing on my oxygen tube”.
14. Today was my first day entering a court. The judge shouted “Order, Order!!” I was so excited, So I shouted back “fried rice with chicken, five bottles of beer and a chilled glass of special ice mineral water.” I am now locked up in a dark room. I am sure they will bring my order soon.
15. I was in a cab today and the cab driver said, “I love my job, I’m my own boss. Nobody tells me what to do.” Then I said, “Turn Left”.
16. I don’t know why it hurts when we bite our tongue mistakenly. But it didn’t hurt when we bite it intentionally. And I still don’t understand why you are biting your tongue now.
17. In every love story, a girl supports her brother, But a brother never supports his sister. Because sister knows what love is and brother knows what boys are.
18. THE BIGGEST LIE Two boys were arguing when the teacher entered the room. The teacher says, “Why are you arguing?” One boy answers, “We found a ten dollar bill and decided to give it to whoever tells the biggest lie.” “You should be ashamed of yourselves,” Said the teacher, “When I was your age I didn’t even know what a lie was.” The boys gave the ten dollars to the teacher.
19. I visited my EX girlfriend and she gave me food. After a few second their dog came in and started to jump over and I said “this dog loves visitors” A child replied, “No! No! Uncle, the problem is that you are using its plate”.
20. A local barber in my area just got arrested for selling drugs. Blew my mind. I’ve been his customer for years. I had no idea he was a barber.
21. 1) I woke up 2) I went to school 3) I saw her 4) I ran to her, and I hugged her 5) I kissed her Actually, the right order is 3, 4, 5, 1, 2
22. I remember once when my dad gave me money to pay the electricity bill but instead I bought a lottery ticket for a brand new car. When I got home explained to my dad what I did and he beat the crap out of me. But the next day, when my dad woke up and opened the door, outside my house was a brand new car. We all cried especially me, Because the car was from the electricity company, they were there to cut off the electricity. My dad beat the crap out of me again.
23. If a paper comes very tough in exam, Just close your eyes for a moment, Take a deep breath and say loudly, “This is a very interesting subject; I want to study it again”.
24. My mom told me to Turn down the volume of music on my computer Or else She would smash my head on the keyboard. But I didn’t believejhyteqfgouy i77uufsrhg.
25. Read all the sentences in order This is this cat This is is cat This is how cat This is to cat This is keep cat This is an cat This is idiot cat This is busy cat This is for cat This is thirty cat This is seconds cat Now go back and read the third word in each sentence.
26. A guy went for an interview at a big IT company for the position of “Computer Hacking Investigator” The boss asked him: So, what makes you suitable for this job? Well, he replied, I hacked into your computer and invited myself to this interview.
27. I asked why Wall of China is the wonder of the world! Answer: It’s the only thing made in China that lasted years.
28. They say milk gives strength. I drank 4 cups and couldn’t move a wall. But when I took 4 bottles of beers, I saw the wall moving itself. These scientists should better stop their lies.
29. The legal age for voting is 18 years and the legal age for marriage is 21 years. Which means you need more experience to handle a girl than a country?